Why A Tired Executive Left His Job to Write a Book (Literally) About Women of Color in Corporate America

During her 20 years climbing the ladder at Deloitte, Deepa Purushothaman amassed a long list of accomplishments: She was the first Indian-American woman to become a partner and one of the youngest partners in the firm’s history; she was appointed head of the company’s WIN women’s initiative and national inclusion managing partner.

Leslie Bohm

On paper, Purushothaman looked like he had “made it”, but about three years ago, some health issues and an overall feeling that he needed to find his purpose in life prompted him to make some major changes. “I was really sick, and I think a big part of it was the stress of travel, the stress of nature [corporate] world, and pay little attention to me,” he said.

Purushothaman takes eight months to recharge. “That time really made me ask myself different questions about what I wanted my life to be, and what space I wanted to work in my life, because until then, I lived to work. Everything I do is about working and progressing. My identity is my job, and I have reached a point where it no longer serves me.”

After the leave, Purushothaman decided to take the leap and leave his stable job at the company. He has since published his first book, First, Few, Only: How Women of Color Can Redefine Power in Corporate Americaand co-founded the nFormation membership community with his former coach Rha Goddess.

On International Women’s Day, Purushothaman sits together Businessman to discuss entrepreneurship, writing, and making room for women of color in corporate America.

You conquer many “firsts” at Deloitte. What was the biggest challenge you faced in achieving your goal, and how did you overcome it?

When you don’t see a role model who looks like you came before you, you question whether you belong. I have to find my own way in many situations — from how I dress and how I present myself, to how I give feedback and even how I ask for what I want. It’s not a model that’s shown to me, so I’m always trying to figure it out, because I don’t see myself represented. And it’s not just at Deloitte. It’s in corporate America, on television, everywhere. When you’re at an institution telling you leadership doesn’t look like you, you have to do your own thing to rewrite the message that you are yours.

What is your approach to finding a mentor?

I did this program with a firm where they matched us with senior partners, and mine was a guy named Jerry. We both walked into the room where we were supposed to meet, and you can’t say we were both really excited about it, but it ended up being one of my most profitable relationships. Right from the start, I shared all the things I was worried about, because I have multiple conman syndrome, which applies to a lot of women of color navigating spaces they don’t see for themselves. But he shared with me—an older white man—that he had it too, and it was a very interesting conversation. I like to see myself represented physically, demographically, ethnically, but you can also have a lot of similar conversations with people who don’t look like you. We need more white male sponsors for people like me.

What convinced you to finally enter the world of entrepreneurship?

Not easy to leave. As a woman of color, I feel very responsible sitting in a chair. I feel like people are going to look at me and say, “He can’t hack it, what does that mean for other people who look like him or have had a similar experience?” I feel very responsible. But I started getting women of color together for one-on-one conversations and dinners, and there were so many shared experiences, and needs that came from those conversations, that it made me want to create a safe space for women of color. , wrote this book and talked about it.

How do you get your book deal?

I wanted to write a book, but I never thought I can write a book. But eight months thinking about that dinner made me want to tell the story of the women. I wanted to give the woman who came after me the book I wish I had. I sold the book six weeks after leaving Deloitte. When you follow your path and your destination, everything clicks — it just clicks and goes fast.

You’ve described this book as a very personal one, and you’ve talked a lot about isolation and burnout. How has this affected your career?

It was really my health experience. I saw my 14th doctor for the fourth or fifth time, and he ran hundreds of tests, and he said, “I think your job is killing you.” And he asked me three life-changing questions: “What would you do if you didn’t do this job? Do you feel compelled to have a big job like this? And would you consider yourself worthy if you did nothing?” It took everything inside of me not to cry, because what he said felt so true. It took more than two, three years to heal, but I have learned to listen to my body.

Since leaving Deloitte, you founded nFormation, which is a community for women of color, by women of color. People often say being an entrepreneur is a 24/7 job. How do you marry that with the fact that you’re trying not to get tired anymore?

I’m very clear about how much space I can give at this point. We do business in slightly different ways, one of which is teaching people that you can burn yourself out if you say yes to everything. If I’m trying to create a business that helps women do things differently, I have to do it differently. We try to live what we preach.

What advice would you give to an entrepreneur who wants to focus on diversity but doesn’t have the resources of a large company?

We need to ask questions and listen in very different ways. Women of color have to tell the truth. There’s an understanding that it doesn’t work, but I don’t think it’s been fully shared because it’s not safe to share yet, and I think a lot of white leaders are afraid to ask. We need to meet each other halfway and give ourselves permission, on both sides, to know that we haven’t had this discussion yet. But there must be a desire and willingness to want to deepen the conversation.