Recently, I was sitting around with my team, and we were talking about the stories of candidates who want to work in our social enterprise. We burst out laughing around the table as we talked about people who should have known better.
Distance is a Problem
For example, I have someone interview me in person. I told this person, who has an impressive resume that the commute to work was 45 minutes each way, and that it was a good day. “Don’t worry,” this person replied and then told me how much he wanted to be part of my innovative team of professionals.
We talked for a long time and moved forward in the process, and then one day, my vice president for administration got an email (they never called in person, did they?) and told him that, in fact, distance was an issue.
Too complicated
A friend and colleague of mine were having discussions with his old tax attorney, and the advisers told him they would be able to handle his complicated, international returns. All they needed was an extra month of time so they could face tax season, as the couple would be filing for an extension.
Not long ago, on a Saturday night no less, the couple received a call from a tax attorney. It was two months after agreeing to restart them telling them that “on second thought” the filings were very complicated and they would have to conform to international tax treaties, and they decided against it. That results in frustration, lots of scrambling, and accelerated returns costing them more money.
Please Say No
I’m sure you’ve been in a situation where someone told you it was a yes before it was a no. Maybe go out to dinner with friends, only to have your friend call you at the last minute to let you know that “something’s up.” It may be your partner who keeps telling you that they will think of something you want to do, but never gives you an answer. Or maybe your boss keeps suggesting a promotion (soon) if you work harder and the goalposts keep moving.
Can we all put an end to the madness and muster the courage to say that whatever it was didn’t work? Wouldn’t you rather know something up front, remove the bandage, and move on with your life? In fact, the most successful people in business will tell you that they often say no. This is one of the best things you can do for yourself and others. For yourself, it saves you energy and helps you stay focused on the activities that really matter to you. For others, you are helping them and saving them the aggravation of more significant disappointment down the line.
Practice Saying No
A lot of people are warriors on social media with their big, bad attitude, but when you talk to them in person, they are fun people. Nobody’s telling you to be rude or mean to other people, but practice the art of saying no. If when you look in the mirror, you’re one of those people who has a hard time saying no to anyone, be sure to put it into practice. You will do good for yourself and everyone in your life. Sure, you might end up with some initial rejection, and disappointment, but over time, you’ll see that people appreciate your genuine attitude.
The reality is that people prefer to know the honest truth, politely, then have you say yes to them just to waste their time and then tell them you’ve changed your mind. Think about it at a time when you tend to tell someone what they want to hear rather than how you feel, deep down–you don’t want to.